For fun, I thought I would provoke a discussion on contributions of ‘him’ and ‘her’ to our respective house holds. For example, if you asked me what my contributions to the SPK household were, I think I would employ a persuasive tone to claim the following:
SPK’s claims on contributions at home:
1. I clean
2. I help with cooking prep
3. I get clothes laundered
4. I read to Rahul at Bedtime
5. I am supportive, but not interfering
6. I stay out of the way.
A fair list, the guys in my broader family and my high school and college buddies might say – ‘Go man!’ you might even say with some enthusiasm.
But let us say after a moment of silent appreciation, you suddenly get suspicious about my claims and decide to get the other side of the story. And let us suppose you take it upon yourself to ask my wife MK, if these above claims that SPK is making to the rest of his family is true.
After another moment of incredulous silence, she may respond thusly:
1. He does not clean. He throws things out. Where the hell is all my stuff?!
2. Puleeaase, that fraud!! His contributions to cooking is pulling out a menu out of the kitchen drawer and ordering in. That is on a regular day. But I will admit he does help with cooking prep, but only when we have guests.
3. On the topic of laundry, could you please ask him to stop! I sincerely don’t need his help on this one! Ask him how many of my dress pants he has given to the laundry and spoiled instead of giving them to the dry cleaner! (SPK: I must admit here, that I once by accident put her cashmere sweater into the wash bag instead of the dry cleaning bag, and it came back the size of a 1 year old baby’s shirt! But shhh...she does not know that – she thinks it is part of item#1 above; which by the way is the lesser of the two evils).
4. The only reason he reads to our son RK,l is to avoid having a real conversation with me in the evening! And could you kindly tell him that I don’t buy that crock that men have the need to use 15K words per day and women 30K.
5. On the topic of ‘not interfering’, that is pure spin. That his way of admitting that he is ‘not pulling his weight at home’
6. That rat! That is his way of saying that he is disappearing all day Saturday for a round of golf!
Let us say that now you, with richer understanding of the whole story tell me about your conversation with MK and her reponse to my (tall) claims.
I then, would have the following conversation with her:
“MK, you are right. I am wrong. I am sorry. I promise that I will make it up to you this weekend.”
(I keep trying to see if this above line works – my old boss taught me this over a glass of beer one evening.)
To which, she would respond:
“SPK, if you think this gets you another round of golf on Sunday after your round today, Saturday, you have another thing coming to you.”
I then do the only thing I can possible do at that time. I go to my study and SMS my golfing buddy RoK – “Sorry dude, no dice for tomorrow”
And RoK's SMS back to me is “same here”
SPK’s claims on contributions at home:
1. I clean
2. I help with cooking prep
3. I get clothes laundered
4. I read to Rahul at Bedtime
5. I am supportive, but not interfering
6. I stay out of the way.
A fair list, the guys in my broader family and my high school and college buddies might say – ‘Go man!’ you might even say with some enthusiasm.
But let us say after a moment of silent appreciation, you suddenly get suspicious about my claims and decide to get the other side of the story. And let us suppose you take it upon yourself to ask my wife MK, if these above claims that SPK is making to the rest of his family is true.
After another moment of incredulous silence, she may respond thusly:
1. He does not clean. He throws things out. Where the hell is all my stuff?!
2. Puleeaase, that fraud!! His contributions to cooking is pulling out a menu out of the kitchen drawer and ordering in. That is on a regular day. But I will admit he does help with cooking prep, but only when we have guests.
3. On the topic of laundry, could you please ask him to stop! I sincerely don’t need his help on this one! Ask him how many of my dress pants he has given to the laundry and spoiled instead of giving them to the dry cleaner! (SPK: I must admit here, that I once by accident put her cashmere sweater into the wash bag instead of the dry cleaning bag, and it came back the size of a 1 year old baby’s shirt! But shhh...she does not know that – she thinks it is part of item#1 above; which by the way is the lesser of the two evils).
4. The only reason he reads to our son RK,l is to avoid having a real conversation with me in the evening! And could you kindly tell him that I don’t buy that crock that men have the need to use 15K words per day and women 30K.
5. On the topic of ‘not interfering’, that is pure spin. That his way of admitting that he is ‘not pulling his weight at home’
6. That rat! That is his way of saying that he is disappearing all day Saturday for a round of golf!
Let us say that now you, with richer understanding of the whole story tell me about your conversation with MK and her reponse to my (tall) claims.
I then, would have the following conversation with her:
“MK, you are right. I am wrong. I am sorry. I promise that I will make it up to you this weekend.”
(I keep trying to see if this above line works – my old boss taught me this over a glass of beer one evening.)
To which, she would respond:
“SPK, if you think this gets you another round of golf on Sunday after your round today, Saturday, you have another thing coming to you.”
I then do the only thing I can possible do at that time. I go to my study and SMS my golfing buddy RoK – “Sorry dude, no dice for tomorrow”
And RoK's SMS back to me is “same here”
2 comments:
AN Eternal Truth stated in good humour
MORALE
Do whatever U may to please your spouse .He/She will never B satisfied with your performance .
Applies to me a 1929 walla & also to couples born later - UNCLE
You do something bad it is bad for spouse -----You do something good even then it is bad for your spouse if the mood of your spouse is bad. So do what ever you want to do which makes you happy and tell your spouse what ever that makes her happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!----(This is only preaching and not in practice mind it)
Subbu
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