During my recent trip to India, I was accompanied by two friends from Philadelphia. We had a great time - might I say, once in a lifetime opportunity to tour one of the great parts of the world.
Being middle-aged, and aware of not wanting to fall sick and so on, we opted for what I might term a 'bubble' tour. ie create a bubble of luxury and experience India from inside the bubble. Not bad at all - I highly recommend you try this.
In any case, we were at the Taj Jai Mahal Palace (bubble!!) one very late evening. We were sitting in the palace grounds (see what I mean?!) puffing on cigars and listening to peacocks caw. Actually, while these birds are pretty, they make the word caw mellifluous compared to their from-the-belly-screech!
This prompted my friend Bill, to narrate his O'Henry-esque true story - a peacock story.
They live in rural Pennsylvania. His wife suddenly desired a peacock for a pet. So he went ahead and got one from a farmer for $60. This one was very noisy, pooped every where and cawed at the top of it's lungs from the rooftop.
Since his neighbors complained he put it in the barn where it got agitated about being trapped! So he let it out. It then when to the neighbors backyard and got aggressive with them. So Bill went to the neighbors backyard with a blanket and chased it around and finally trapped it.
Story gets better!
He comes back home and his wife says, this peacock is lonely let's get him a peahen for company. He agrees! Now they have 2 peacocks!
And suddenly one day both of them - the peacock and the peahen disappear.
Story gets better!
Then they hear a lot of loud cawing noise in the wooded area behind their house and he is not at home and so his wife investigates.
She finds the peacock there - so she just walks upto him, picks him up and carries him under her arm back to the barn. Presently, she notices the peahen quietly following her and the said peacock.
After some time she notices ANOTHER peahen following her. Now they have 3 peacocks in the house.
End of this story gets better!
Getting tired of 3 cawing peacocks, with large sticky poop all over the place, they finally decide to return them to the farmer who sold them the fowl in the first place.
When he calls the farmer, the farmer says he wants $60 to take each peacock back, so now he pays $180, on top of the $120 he had originally paid to get the first 2.
When he came back home, his wife started a discussion about getting a goat
I don't think I laughed so hard at at a story, much less a true one like this!
But I can't help projecting my own imagination given what we have learned above to the finish to this story.
So Bill's wife says, 'we should discuss getting a goat!'
Now, a person like me, after this experience, would splurt the coffee out of his mouth and utter an expletive. But we are talking about my friend Bill here.
So this is what I imagine him saying in reply. He is slouched in his reading chair in his study. He is stoking his beard as he peaceably contemplates this suggestion. And he replies:
"Honey, you mean a billy goat or an actual Ram?!"
Being middle-aged, and aware of not wanting to fall sick and so on, we opted for what I might term a 'bubble' tour. ie create a bubble of luxury and experience India from inside the bubble. Not bad at all - I highly recommend you try this.
In any case, we were at the Taj Jai Mahal Palace (bubble!!) one very late evening. We were sitting in the palace grounds (see what I mean?!) puffing on cigars and listening to peacocks caw. Actually, while these birds are pretty, they make the word caw mellifluous compared to their from-the-belly-screech!
This prompted my friend Bill, to narrate his O'Henry-esque true story - a peacock story.
They live in rural Pennsylvania. His wife suddenly desired a peacock for a pet. So he went ahead and got one from a farmer for $60. This one was very noisy, pooped every where and cawed at the top of it's lungs from the rooftop.
Since his neighbors complained he put it in the barn where it got agitated about being trapped! So he let it out. It then when to the neighbors backyard and got aggressive with them. So Bill went to the neighbors backyard with a blanket and chased it around and finally trapped it.
Story gets better!
He comes back home and his wife says, this peacock is lonely let's get him a peahen for company. He agrees! Now they have 2 peacocks!
And suddenly one day both of them - the peacock and the peahen disappear.
Story gets better!
Then they hear a lot of loud cawing noise in the wooded area behind their house and he is not at home and so his wife investigates.
She finds the peacock there - so she just walks upto him, picks him up and carries him under her arm back to the barn. Presently, she notices the peahen quietly following her and the said peacock.
After some time she notices ANOTHER peahen following her. Now they have 3 peacocks in the house.
End of this story gets better!
Getting tired of 3 cawing peacocks, with large sticky poop all over the place, they finally decide to return them to the farmer who sold them the fowl in the first place.
When he calls the farmer, the farmer says he wants $60 to take each peacock back, so now he pays $180, on top of the $120 he had originally paid to get the first 2.
When he came back home, his wife started a discussion about getting a goat
I don't think I laughed so hard at at a story, much less a true one like this!
But I can't help projecting my own imagination given what we have learned above to the finish to this story.
So Bill's wife says, 'we should discuss getting a goat!'
 |
| Billy Goat |
So this is what I imagine him saying in reply. He is slouched in his reading chair in his study. He is stoking his beard as he peaceably contemplates this suggestion. And he replies:
"Honey, you mean a billy goat or an actual Ram?!"
1 comment:
If you are a real friend, you need to beat some sense into Bill :)
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